The Life and Times of C4RN3V1L

Chapter 1: The Captain Save-A-Hoe Cycle

   As everyone knows I have no cruise control when it comes to women; which can be a good thing for most but when it comes to me personally, the lack of chill has created a serious problem. Cycle a noun defined as a series of events that are regularly repeated in the same order, and many would define insanity as regularly repeating the same action the same way expecting different results.

Here lies the problem

I have always been taught how to treat a woman, be it by my family or learning it from constant hours of old school slow jams. 

1. If she needs anything, you get if for her no questions asked.
2. If she wants anything, you get it no matter what. She should want for nothing.
3. If she talks you listen
4. Her dreams are your dreams and if you have to break your back to make them a reality you do it no questions asked.
5. Respect her
6. Love her
7. Cherish her

These things come naturally to me, but sadly these things happen out the gate with me, even if we are not even dating. So if I have feelings for you when dealing with me these things become your reality, but this leaves me open to easily be played and toyed with. I'm not stupid because I know these things but I find myself thinking every time things will be different, more often then not it never is.

Obvious solution

"Terrell how about you don't do that?" seems like a very simple solution right? Wrong the problem is if I don't give it all from the gate I feel like I'm cheating the lady out of my 110% and it the doesn't feel right. So it's like being stuck between a rock and a hard place even though the problem is all internal. A mental hurdle that for some odd reason I am having the most annoying time getting over.

The mental reasoning behind it all...

If you have everything you want and need you should be happy right? Well that is my end goal the girl I am interested in is happy not just with me, happy in general. You being happy makes me happy.

Maybe it's the wrong women?

If I'm picking the wrong women then wouldn't the real problem lie within me and not the women I'm picking?